Never a moment to my self ever again.

I have always thought that I would like to be a housewife.  

Being at home all day and take care of my children. Today my husband approached me while I cooked, and said with pride and love: You are indeed a real housewife. You are as good as an Arab woman and makes equally good food. It was meant as a compliment. But it got me thinking. I have a full time job. Being a mom, being a housewife is to have a full time job. A full time job that occurs throughout the day. When I start work again, it will then be two full-time jobs. I will never ever again in the next 18 years at least, to have a moment to myself.  

It does not help to have a man who never does anything unless I nag about it. I'm so tired. I have not slept a single night in 4 months, and I have to get up so early every day, clean, take care of the boy, cook, wash ..... My husband is home by the way. All day long. But he does not lift a finger. But sometimes he can take care of our son, but after half an hour, he thinks that it is enough and wants me to take him again. The half hour is not for myself, no, it is for me to wash or cook. Maybe a shower if I'm lucky.  

The minute I became a mother, I stopped to think: I want, I need. Instead, I started thinking about my son and what he needs. I also think about my husband´s needs. I want to be a good wife afterall. My husband however, thinks of himself. It annoys me very much that he considers himself entitled to only think about his own needs and desires without spending a moment to think about me or our son or what we might need.

Sometimes he does step up and do stuff and I know he finds it hard that he has no job but he does have a family. And really I would be so much a better wife and a mother if he let me have my own time now and then. Everyone need some time alone sometimes, if they do they become better persons because they would have more patience with the people around them.

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5 Lovley thoughts:

~x Aisha x~ said...

my husband was lazy at first as well, until i got mad and told him that it was affecting my health, and that he needs to step up and help out. It is his job to take care of you and it doesn't say anywhere in the Quran that the wife must cook and clean. its actually the other way round! the husband must provide for his wife and if she requires extra help, get her a maid if he can afford it. stand your ground as your health is the most important thing you have, without it u are totally reliant on someone else

http://www.sunnah.org/msaec/articles/responsibilities_husband.htm

Ala said...

Salam syster!

Tack för kommentaren på min blogg, du har en finare blogg du!
Nu har jag skrivit ett recept, hoppas att det var ngt i närheten du sökte.

Ws

hijabi said...

I have to agree with ~x Aisha x~

The husband must provide for his wife and kids!!!

lala said...

I agree with the above poster. Show him the sources to prove it if you need to. He shouldn't act like that, especially at yours and his son's expense. Being a mom is a full-time exhausting job in itself, but being a housewife too? That's another. You deserve help. You'll be an even better mom for it too iA. May Allah SWT reward you for your patience and sacrifices so far, and reward your husband when he iA starts to help.

Zaynab said...

DU är verkligen en superkvinna ju! MashaAllah! kram!!!!!!! ws