A muslimah Mother: March 2011

pre-school/kindergarten/nursery or whatever it is called

3/23/2011 10:07:00 AM | Categories: Personal diary

Oh it's beautiful weather outside today! I'll certainly take a walk after lunch. I feel so much happier now that the weather is better! more sunshine and warmer than it has been for many months.

Yesterday I went to a kindergarten that is open to children and parents. That is, the mothers are with their children at the preschool a few hours. It's really fun. Then I get the chance to meet other moms and my little ray of sunshine can meet other babies. We sit with the children on a large rug and so they can lie there and babble to each other and we moms can share some experiences with each other. Then we sing with the children. It's very good that there are such pre-schools because it is almost the only chance to meet other people and above all, other mothers in the first year that you are at home with your children. Yesterday was my little guy really seemed to like a little girl of 4 months. He tried to eat her hand! haha That was just so funny! He is really cute.

I was also looking at preschools/kindergartens that may be of interest since when he shall begin at the preschool next year. There is a kindergarten right where I live and those who worked there were really super unpleasant. I do not want my son to go there all day if it is in this way as they treat their parents. The other school, however, seemed much better. I have tried to contact the Muslim pre-school which is near where I live but I have not yet succeeded. I'm very curious about it but I know that they have a very long queue so we'll see what happens with that one.

So far, it is quite a long time before he begins, and that day will be one of the hardest days for me in a long time. But I have to start working again when I no longer get any money from the insurance fund and in fact I think it'll be fun to start working again. especially since I'll start a whole new sort of employment when I get back and it will be so exciting.

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My little guy

3/22/2011 11:13:00 AM | Categories: Motherhood and family

I'm very surprised at myself. I am surprised by my own feelings.

I am breastfeeding my little boy and has obviously been doing so since he was born. I have often thought it was a bit awkward when I'm going to go out among other people and my baby wants food. I do not like to breastfeed in public, even if I have a blanket over my son and myself to hide us. But it has happened that have to do it. necessity knows no law and my children's needs must come first. But I can usually find a nursing room or a toilet that I can hide myself on.

Now I have started to give my baby some food, small servings of flavor. I give him porridge in the morning, a vegetable puree for lunch and fruit puree for a snack in the afternoon. There are no large amounts I give him but it means that I do not have to breast-feed as often.

Now, I think it feels very strange that I am not breastfeeding so often. I miss to breastfeed my baby. Now I wish I breastfeed more often. How weird is that? When I had to always breast feed, then I thought it was hard and now that I do not breast feed more than 4 times per day, I miss it. I don´t really think the breast-feed is the problem I think it is because I feel my little guy is growing up so fast. I want him to always be small, but at the same time I think it is so fun to watch him develop and grow. I have really mixed feelings about this.

Oh and by the way the doctor called me yesterday and the surgery is booked and will be in two weeks. please make dua for my little guy.

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A little sunshine behind the dark clouds

3/19/2011 10:03:00 PM | Categories: Motherhood and family

We visited the new doctor a few days ago. He wants to do the circumcision in no more than two months. He will put my son to sleep and he will take the help of an anesthesiologist,nurse anesthetist and himself who shall do the circumcision. This will cost a lot, but honestly,the most important thing is that my baby feel good. I feel safe with this doctor.

He seems very competent. Insha Allah it will be resolved for the best this time. I really need to get closure on this. But I feel better now after having been talking to this doctor. I noticed that he wants to help us and that feels good.

I want to thank you for your warm comments and that you have been patient with me. I know I talked a lot about this and soon Insha Allah, I can put this story behind me.

I went to a friend today, It was really nice and the weather was lovley! It was a perfect walk to her. It took about 30 min and it was perfect.

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Apparently he did nothing wrong.... yeah right........

3/17/2011 12:54:00 PM | Categories: Motherhood and family

So it is time for yet another visit to the doctor for our little son who has been circumcised. if there is anyone who has missed this difficult period in my life, his circumcision was made wrong and must now be repeated at some time. We were at the doctor that performed the circumcision yesterday to question his actions but he does not believe that he had done anything wrong. According to him, this is something that happens even if it is unusual. But today we will go to another doctor who I have a lot more confidence in. We shall see what he says now about this.

My sister's son was circumcised last week by another doctor who apparently uses a laser. It went very well and the boy are doing well. Oh how I wish we had gone to that doctor instead of this stupid doctor. I´ve been feeling ill for the last week. I´ve been tired, nausea, and pain in my stomach. I think it is the stress over this whole situation that is finally getting to me. This really have been one of the worst things I´ve been through in my life. Mess with me, sure I can take it, but mess with my son, that is just way to much for me to handle. I just want to protect him and this time I could not and he is so tiny, he is just a baby. How could someone do such a thing to a little baby? I just don´t understand. I thank Allah and for the faith I have in Allah. I am not sure I would be able to get through this otherwise.

I feel that there is not so much happening here with me. I am mostly at home with my little son who is now a full 5 months. (he has become so big my little guy) And now spring is coming so now I have to really start going out a bit. Go for a walk in the sun, it's wonderful. I have really missed the spring.